Tuesday, May 27, 2008

say "No"?

got to read this article ... and i kinda can relate with it somehow? :D
it's a good read...

from http://bosanchez.ph/learn-to-say-no%e2%80%a6so-you-can-say-a-bigger-yes-to-life/
Learn To Say No…So You Can Say A Bigger Yes To Life!
by Bo Sanchez


Difficult People Will Teach You How To Build Your Boundaries

If you’re an approval addict or people-pleaser like me, I’m writing this especially to you.

You see, I’m a person who didn’t like saying “No”.

For the longest time, that word wasn’t even in my vocabulary.

For years, I never showed my anger to anyone. After years of smiling even if I was offended, there came a point when I didn’t even feel anger anymore. I simply shut it out of my life. (Believe me, I thought I was very holy because of this. Not realizing I was emotionally a mess deep within.)

I had an approval addiction so powerful, it ruled every decision I made.

Why? Because I was desperate for people to like me.

When someone didn’t like me, I died within.

I didn’t love myself.

I had an abysmal low-self worth.

So I tried to please everyone in everyway.

I abhorred any kind of conflict.

Oh yes, I was a mess.

And one of the ways of making them love me was to always say “Yes.”

I never knew that saying “Yes” all the time was actually saying “No” to an abundant life.

So I tolerated all the difficult people and emotional vampires on the planet: Control-Freaks. Drama-Queens. Nut-Cases. Rage-aholics. Irresponsible Jerks. Hyper-sensitive people. Possessive Parasites. You name the difficult person, I pleased each one of them—just to keep the peace. But the false peace came with a price: I was throwing away myinner peace. My self-respect. My self-worth.

Let me tell you one story…

Build Your Boundaries—

So You Could Welcome People As Guests Through The Gate,

Not Thieves That Run Amok Through Your Life

Billy (not his real name) was a friend who invited me to become a business partner in one of his ventures.

But he had a weakness: He was a controller. He wanted to control me. He wanted to control everyone. The sun and moon and stars included.

For a while, I lived with it. I chalked it up as one of those inconveniences of life, lumped up with Manila traffic, the humidity of the Philippines, and my allergies to shrimp.

But it was incredibly stressful working with Billy.

I didn’t want to admit it. “But he’s my friend,” I told myself every time I felt stressed out. I was in denial. My approval addiction was blinding me to the fact that working with him was driving me nuts.

But one day, I had to say “No” and build my personal boundaries. I allowed him to stomp over my fences many times. I had to repair my boundaries and protect myself.

It was painful, but I knew there was only one way out. So one day, I told Billy that though I wanted to remain friends, I wanted to get out of our business partnership.

That wasn’t acceptable to him. So ever since that day, he never spoke to me again. It was painful because our friendship ended.

But I immediately knew I did the right thing because of the inner peace I felt that day. My approval addiction was defanged. For the first time in a long while, I created a conflict. By respecting myself and my boundary lines, I was growing in self-power.

That day, I finally loved myself.

Today, my relationships are richer.

Because my boundaries are whole, people who come into my life are welcomed guests who pass through the gate (I deliberately opened it for them), not thieves that run amok through my life.

When you say “No” at the right situations, you’re saying a bigger “Yes” to life.

Truth: People Will Do What You Tolerate

So let me ask you this question: Are there people in your life who you should be saying “No” to? Are there difficult people in your life who have been gate-crashing and running amok in your life?

Remember: You teach people how to treat you.

If that person is abusing you, or breaking your boundaries, that means you taught that person that it was okay to do so. You tolerated it. And people will do what you tolerate.

The solution may not be to end the relationship (though sometimes, it is the solution), but to simply say “No” at the specific situations where the person is crossing your boundary lines.

Reclaim your self.

Don’t allow people to trash you.

God loves you. God created you as His child. God wants you to be happy.

So be happy.

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

Monday, May 26, 2008

broken

broke down...
when everything seems wrong...and nothing goes right...even if you try...

you've done nothing but to disappoint the people around you...
you've done nothing but to feel that you are useless...

...and mixed emotions fills you up...
that brings you to tears and to break down...



Broken
by Lifehouse


The Broken clock is a comfort
It helps me sleep tonight
Maybe it can stop tomorrow
From stealing all my time
And I am here still waiting
Though I still have my doubts
I am damaged at best
Like you've already figured out


I'm falling apart
I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart
That's still beating
In the pain
There is healing
In your name
I find meaning
So I'm holding on
(I'm holdin on)(I'm holdin on)
I'm barely holding on to you

The broken locks were a warning
You got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded
I'm an open book instead
And I still see your reflection
Inside of my eyes
That are looking for purpose
They're still looking for life


I'm falling apart
I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart
That's still beating
In the pain (In the pain)
Is there healing
In your name
I find meaning
So I'm holding on (I'm still holdin on)(I'm holdin on)
(I'm still holdin on) (I'm holdin on)
I'm barely holding on to you

I'm hanging on another day
Just to see what, you will throw my way
And I'm hanging on, to the words you say
You said that I will, will be okay
The broken light on the freeway
Left me here alone
I may have lost my way now
But I haven't forgotten my way home


I'm falling apart
I'm barely breathing
With a broken heart
That's still beating
In the pain (In the pain)
There is healing
In your name (In your name)
I find meaning
So I'm holding on (I'm still holdin')(I'm holdin' on)(I'm still holdin') (I'm holdin' on) (I'm still holdin')
Barely holding on to you (I'm still holdin on)
Barely holdin on to you



and hearing this song...
makes you more emotional...
and back in feeling...
alone.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Hopeless?

Hopeless of not buying something for…
Or hopeless of not having work?

How sad.

Why not believe? And say something positive?...

Coz…that's what is needed.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Back to footie.

Ohhh… it feels just like last year. Nostalgic?
Yeah. I was bum back then and just having fun with all about football and some side stuff. Haha
*wishing…it comes back…
every thing was just simple…hmmm…*

I wanted so baddd to be in Iloilo…why? Haaay.

Well, the AFC Challenge Cup just ended last Saturday. And our Team, Philippine Football Men’s National Team, ended it with a clean sheet! Yay!

Philippines – 1
Brunei – 0
(should have gotten more goals if it wasn’t with the freaking lousy pitch!)

Philippines – 0
Tajikistan – 0
(great performance against a top team…dang err for that red card. But was a boost for us! Hahaha…ok now, so what really happened at the hotel lobby incident? Yikes…lol)

Philippines – 3
Bhutan – 0
(yay! but just wasn’t enough…)

Though we didn’t loose any of those games, it was still not enough to qualify to the next round. Dang frustrating! yes, just because of the goal difference. Oh well.

But I enjoyed all of those games. I even watched the replays just to see them all play again. It was also fun getting insights and updates of it online where people were all pumped up for our team.

And yeah…Aww… I just also miss seeing them play together. And it’s just so nice to see the development of the team and football in our country.
I really do believe that it’s getting there. Football is really peaking here. And that’s what we need to improve and be back on top again.
And oh yeah… lots of support is needed from everyone!

Ok…Just wanted some shout outs to…
Chippy Calindong…yeah! You really have good football skills. So fast …and great goal! Oh…and you deserve to be the captain!
Ali Borromeo, Anton del Rosario, Chris Greatwich and Phil G. (ang kulit! hehe) …nice game…slides…defense…and ball handling…and Chris, what can I say?! Gah! You’re really are composed when talking to the refs…Great leadership out there together with Ali.
Phil Y. and Chad Gould, thank you for all the effort and the goals!!! Made the game really exciting. Hehe
James…you were good out there. Though limited playing time, everyone can see that you did your best. Great cross passes and plays with your brother. And you are such an emotional player. Hmm..haha but that was needed. And oh yeah, pain free? Hope so…
Neil Etheridge…thanks for a clean sheet! First time that I’ve seen you with the team and I am impressed! You are young and you have a bright future ahead of you! Keep it up…and play for us again? Hehe

Ok now… I just miss footie again. And have to wait until October for the ASEAN?!
Oh…there should be more friendlies then…
well, I just hope to see you mates play again.
Go Philippines!
Go Azkals!
Go mates? lol

---
And oh…yeah…just knew what really happened with Phil and the LA Galaxy (that I also did a blog last time).
Dang…that was insulting. But I just hope that all the news should be laid out right away and not later on. So that people would know and not react the way they shouldn’t be. And Phil? (as much as people want you to be here) Please stay in Europe and try other teams out there for much training and experience. That would be good for you, for your football career and at the same time, it can help also our team whatever you get from there. Ayt? :)

all the best!:)

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Here we go again…

Family stuff that I just don’t want to deal with.
It just gets me emotional when the family and relatives are involved in some situations.

You just don’t know what was really wanted.
You just don’t know what to do.

But what helps is that the concern for us … the love and the concern that we feel from her. Thank you po!
I’m sure he is happy with that…for us…

*Oh…I just wish that daddy is still here to make things simpler.*

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

A Round Up!

It’s been awhile that I haven’t written a blog. I was just kinda …ummm… busy or lazy? I’d say both! Haha so… let’s see…

Well…I am back to being a bum. Last March, I nervously gave my resignation. (Yeah, I was freaking nervous! Dang!). But I made it through that day. And after that, oh come on! No more life! I mean…I can still remember that non-stop work. It’s like I’ve been doing a two or three man job at the same time. Oh…that led me to a one sick leave. I guess I deserved that (?) Anyway, ‘til the very last minute…I was busy! Dang! I didn’t even feel that I’ll be leaving work. I didn’t event have the time to talk and catch up with friends at work and say goodbyes to them. Oh well. But at least my last day ended good naman. I had a good dinner with our team.

The next day… I was off to BORACAY! My reward for myself! Yay! It was still fun. Just being with friends...taking pictures…pigging out (?) hehe…seeing the sand, clear water and bumming all day under the sun at the beach…gah! just a nice feeling…how simple life is…yeah?

Hmm…what else? Oh yeah…going back to our house. Same place. Same neighborhood (that I love). But a new house. And I’m excited for its blessing but until then…sooo many things to do for the house…err…errands…and a lot of things to fix. If I can just magic and fix everything and put them into their places, I would!
That’s what keeps me busy and also my Spanish classes. Yeah! Nah...It just feels good to go back to school, be inside the classroom and just learning (without any pressure). Gotta love that! It makes me productive while looking for work. That’s a good one! Yeah? Yeah.

But in between that, what do I do? Explore photography / lomography and bug friends at YM. Haha and yeah, chatting with cousins whom I haven’t seen since birth! Awww…Hahaha

And now, oh… back to footy! Just (a bit) like last year…bummer and enjoying the games. Hahaha it feels good to see them play again.
Philippines (1) won over Brunei (0) yesterday! Cheers! Yay! Though the pitch was so bad, it was still a good game. Hope we win the next two games!

So…I guess that’s it…a round up of what I’ve done and been doing.
Eh? hehehe